Is a bully ‘bad?’


If you have read some of my earliest content on this blog, you know I believe a bully does not wake up one day and decide they want to be very bad people. I believe a bully has someone or someones in their lives that have treated them in a way that shapes them into being bullies. Because it can be, in some ways, considered ‘not their fault,’ it begs the question:

Are bullies bad people?

To answer a question this deep, we have to do a lot of thinking–People’s own morals and values usually weigh in on their answers to this question.

A bully takes deliberate action to harass and harm the people around them. This is clear evidence to the opinion that they are ‘bad people.’ On the contrary, they take these actions because they are insecure about themselves, and have been shown that stripping someone else’s confidence is the way to be above others. This can be used to support the side that they are not ‘bad people,’ simply victims of ‘bad circumstance.’

Or do you believe ‘good’ and ‘bad’ are too thin terms?(Please, tell me if you believe that, and why!)

A bully can be looked at from many different perspectives; but I don’t think any of them will ever be classified as ‘right.’

Thanks for reading.

-Kyletheantibully

Cliques


What is your definition of a clique?

To me, a clique is a stereotyped group of people classified by another group of these stereotyped people.

Uhhh…..okay, let’s make that a little more understandable. I believe a clique is a way people identify other people.

‘Nerd.’ ‘Jock.’ ‘Bully.’ ‘Geek.’ ‘Yes-Man/Woman.’ Cliques are ways of identifying that are usually meant to bully/humiliate someone else-“Hey, nerd!” “Look at that big fat jock.” “Man, that guys such a geek.” There is no real way to stop anyone from using these terms, because they are so common. However, you can reduce how much you use them, and try and stop it if you see it. (I’m not saying not to see someone bullying and say ‘that guy/girl is a bully’–I’m saying not to use the terms with grains of salt.)

If you see someone you know classifying another, step in. Evaluate the situation. If you know who is being classified, or the classifier, or both, use that to your advantage–Appeal to their friendliness(assuming you have friends who are…friendly) and try to defuse the situation.

The use of cliques as titles need to be reduced. The insecure people in our world are use to these cliques. And these identifying words seem to have more power than nine true, heart-felt compliments.

 

Try your hardest to reduce the amount you use these terms, and try to stop it if you see it.

 

Thanks for reading.

-Kyletheantibully

Bullying in Video Games


Video games- I love video games. Most of them are incredibly fun, and have a lot artistic and emotional value. However, they also hold one area of calamity, hate, and bigotry: Multiplayer.

Similar to cyber-bullying, where messages and hate get spread across the internet, video game bullying is handed out over video games, specifically in multiplayer. A good example is the messages spread around Xbox Live, the online gaming service provided by Microsoft. The private messaging with this service allows free messaging that is completely unrestricted and unmonitored,(unless a parent changes something in the system/family settings) allowing for bullying at a level that is limited only by the senders imagination. There is a report function, but a few bullying messages usually don’t provoke Microsoft’s attention.

An example of video game bullying that I commonly see is ‘trolling.’ This is a type of bullying where someone or many someones mess with one or several other people by saying or doing something to receive an angry response, with the hope that the other will receive any repercussions. A youtube video I once watched showed four boys over the age of fourteen trolling a seven year old. They were all playing minecraft, and the teenagers were finding various ways to mess with him. The video basically ended with the boy sobbing and calling them jerks. That is the perfect example of the bullying in video games.

Try asking yourself how you can stop this bullying. If someone is trolling you and other people, assure the other people receiving the trolling that not feeding a troll’s endless pit of hunger is the best option. You, yourself; find a way to report whoever is doing this trolling.

Trolls don’t care about any emotion they receive except for anger. Be sure to give them something quite opposite.

Thanks for reading,

-Kyletheantibully

Cyber-Bullying versus Bullying


What a controversial, back-and-forth topic. Cyber-bullying…There are thousands of different opinions and views on them…Some including ‘It’s worse than bullying,’ ‘They’re on the same level,’ ‘What is cyber-bullying,’ and ‘Cyber-bullying is a myth.’ (The final of which stuns me.)

 

If your answer would be the fourth, let me give you the dictionary definition, and my definition.

 

Dictionary Definition: the electronic posting of mean-spirited messages about a person (as a student) often done anonymously- http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/cyber-bullying

My Definition: Bullying given to others through the use of technological devices,(such as phones, social media, and chatrooms.) often in a higher level of vulgarity or violence than normal bullying.

The difference between Cyber-bullying and Bullying is that it’s behind a screen; when someone is not looking another person in the face, they have a lot more confidence that no action will be taken against them, and thus, they feel the need to say whatever they wish, and this can really affect people. A huge difference is that so many creative things can be done with Cyber-bullying. Multiple facebook pages can be made hating on someone, they can spam someone’s youtube, twitter, etc.(I don’t use most social medias, so I don’t know the names) to hurt another, and people can create entire websites just to spite one person.

 

Cyber-bullying is home to many suicides.

 

…His(Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd) client and the other girl¬† were arrested in October, more than a month after Rebecca Sedwick jumped to her death from a cement plant tower after enduring what police described as months of verbal, physical and online bullying…

 

…Two students from separate schools committed suicide within days of each other this month — which is National Bullying Prevention Month(October) — and both boys apparently had been bullied. Now, parents are asking questions not just about bullying but also about anti-bullying videos, which both schools aired shortly before the incidents…

 

Cyber-bullying has been ignored by a lot as just another form that needs to be dealt with like Bullying- This isn’t true! A conversation, an apology, mediation, whatever- It is gone from a bullies minds after they’re home behind a computer screen, especially if they’re with their friends. This is an ineffective way to deal with it–It needs harsher, less leeway-ish punishments that get the message across- NO.

 

When you see or hear about cyber-bullying, do something. Don’t let it sit, and don’t let someone be pushed around and stepped on without the problem actually being stopped.

 

My message is the same as always–Don’t let it sit.

 

Don’t stand by— Step up.

 

-Kyle

Bullying- Social vs. Academic


I remember one way I used to deal with bullies was to use logic. If I send a ton of complicated, big-worded, politically correct statements, it overflows their brain, and they can’t bully as well.

 

Right?

 

Well, one thing I discovered was that when I flood them with logic, they only become more riled up; they start thinking I’m trying to sound smarter than them, and it feeds their want to take away my level of intelligence. That is why I stopped using Academic logic to stop bullying.

 

A social bullying skill is something like diffusing the situation by stepping back and walking away or telling a friend you don’t appreciate a joke in a friendly way.(Captain Kirk) An academic bullying skill is something like diffusing the situation by referencing problems and new ideas from classes and knowledge you have obtained or telling a friend you don’t appreciate a joke by trying to deconstruct the joke with logical statements and literal thinking.(Mr. Spock)

Let’s give an example of both.

 

Todd: Hey! Don’t shove me like that, you dumb loser! Watch where you’re going!

Aron: Dude, I didn’t shove you. I wouldn’t do that to someone I don’t know.

Todd: Yeah, right! You shoved right into me! I’m sure both of my friends saw it! Right?

Ben: Yeah, he shoved you.

Justin: Yeah, I saw it.

Aron: Look, sorry if you think I shoved you, but I didn’t. I hope you can still have a nice day.(Walks away.)

 

In this scenario, Aron, the believed antagonist of the situation, tries to diffuse the scenario by taking a peaceful approach and choosing peaceful words that don’t blame himself, but don’t put the blame on anyone else. He ends by walking away, giving Todd time to reflect on the situation to try and see the story again from his eyes.

Let’s take a look at a logic based example.

 

Todd: Hey! Don’t shove me like that, you dumb loser! Watch where you’re going!

Aron: Dude, I didn’t shove you. I was too far away.

Todd: Yeah, right! You shoved right into me! I’m sure both of my friends saw it! Right?

Ben: Yeah, he shoved you.

Justin: Yeah, I saw it.

Aron: Look, I didn’t shove you. I was on the other side of the hallway. There’s just no way I was the one who shoved you!

Todd: Yeah, you did! You better say you’re sorry, or I am going to tell the security card you’re trying to bully me!

Aron: I didn’t shove you! I was on the other side of the hall! There’s no way it was me!

Todd: (Storms off with Ben and Justin, reporting Aron.)

In this scenario, Aron has tried to shove the blame onto someone else by stating he was not close enough to shove Todd. There is no way to prove this without getting some witness or video tape(which wouldn’t be used for such a situation) and leaves the blame unaccounted for. This is an example of a bad way to handle a situation.

 

Social and Academic bullying skills are to be used differently— A good time for Academic bullying skills is while competing against another team or student, and state(whether you win or lose) that it is a simple game to improve your Academic skills.

 

-Kyletheantibully

Family Bullying


Have you ever sat around at home, talking with your parents about something serious, and suddenly one of them says something very mean?

 

This is not a very specific thought; it can mean a lot. A parent tells you to leave, a parent tells you just to ‘deal with it,’ a parent tells you ‘too bad…’ Almost everyone has been there. Family bullying is worse than school/work bullying; it is often the cause of a bully being formed in the very first place.

A common form of Family Bullying is when a child is seeking help from an older brother, sister, parent, or older adult. The child is in desperate need of this help, but the response might be to ‘toughen up’ or to ‘deal with it.’ Shockingly(to me, at the least) this is most common among the parents and adults. This shocks me, as they are the most influential source of character for a child.

 

A brother or sister usually is more prone to such a response; a response such as ‘Go throw your problems in someone else’s face,’ or ‘Is that my problem?’

This bullying is such a serious issue because the people we rely on the most are throwing away our problems like nothing. This is a common cause of depression, which is the most common disease among teenagers in all of America. A good way to prevent this is, if you are an adult, a brother, a sister, an uncle, an aunt, a mother, a father, or any other figure in a child’s life, is to offer as much support as you can without solving someone’s problems for them; guide them on their path to self-confidence and assurance in their own ability. If you are a child or teenager, the best thing for you is to let go of the belief that everything that is thrown at your feet has to be dealt with using your own feet; there are others out there who will help you get through the hardest of situations. A consular, a parent, a friend, a teacher…You aren’t alone. Anyone can help; I can help; Just don’t believe you are alone.

 

Don’t stand by- Step Up.

 

-Kyletheantibully

Viruses


Viruses…most of us experience them. I just did. My computer has been down for about two months because of one virus. I am, however, back, and hope to soon be actively posting and repay the lack of posting I have given to my followers.

Thanks for staying with your friendly Anti-Bully.

-Kyletheantibully

Response to Daily Prompt: Too Soon


Can anything be funny, or are some things off limits?

 

All the readers of my blog can probably assume I will be talking about bullying in this post. There are plenty of times when jokes or simple comments are taken to far and boundaries aren’t realized at the right point. There are jokes I am stunned to hear that I’ve heard in the first year of middle school. There was a joke I am too uncertain of typing up because I do not want any younger readers to see the joke, but that should give you an idea. I don’t want to type it up because of it’s content.

 

If I am with a group of friends and someone says I joke I feel or believe is too far, I will say so. When I’m with friends, I expect they will respect my wish for the joke to be left alone. It’s easy to be in a group of friends, be having a great time, and then let something slip that you thought would work out but didn’t.

 

I think it is critical that the person acknowledge this mistake, so that it can be accepted as a mistake and then left alone, so the group of friends can easily move on from this slip up.

 

My personal opinion…things like making fun of homeless citizens, general bullying, hating on, say, the city council/department for failing to do something, and general heckling of anyone or thing. There are exceptions, of course, but they are few and far between.

 

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/08/13/daily-prompt-funny-2/

Response to Daily Prompt: P.C.


Is political correctness a useful concept, or does it stifle honest discussion?

 

Political correctness has it’s own use in it’s own way. It is good at some points, while it simply hinders and hurts conversation in other places. If I am having an interview for my first job with an interviewer, I’m going to be politically correct; if I am sitting somewhere with a group of my good friends, I am going to focus on having fun, not being politically correct. This would rid lots of fun from discussions if I did not go along with nonsensical jokes. However, I have my own boundaries to watch. I will not stoop to a level of insulting a disadvantages group because of a joke.

 

Political correctness is something you use and apply in a case-by-case basis.

 

http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/08/11/daily-prompt-useful/